Affirming support for queer, neurodivergent adults
Does any of this sound familiar?
I can hold it together all day, then get home and have nothing left for food, messages or conversation.
I hold a PGDip in Occupational Therapy and have experience working in NHS mental health, alongside my own lived experience of ADHD. That means I bring both clinical training and an inside understanding of how neurodivergence can shape work, relationships, identity and daily life.
My coaching is queer-affirming, trauma-informed and practical. We work at your pace, starting with what’s happening in your life and finding approaches that actually fit you.
Neurodivergent Coaching With Stella
We’ll work together on what matters in your life, without measuring you against expectations that were never designed with neurodivergent people in mind.
Understand rejection sensitivity, masking and impostor syndrome
Build co-regulation and interdependence
Find ways to reduce overwhelm and stress
Create routines and organisation that work with your brain
Develop greater self-understanding and self-compassion
In our queer ADHD coaching sessions, we’ll look at what’s getting in the way, what’s already working, and where you want things to feel different. We’ll find practical approaches that fit your strengths, identity and neurodivergence.
What We Can Work On
Relationships Including Ethical Non-Monogamy (ENM), Relationship Anarchy (RA) and other forms of relationship diversity. We can work on boundaries, communication, intimacy, including kink and BDSM, and navigating relationship dynamics in ways that work for you.
Working Life We can work on focus, time management, deadlines, burnout, reasonable adjustments and building confidence at work. I have experience supporting people across the public sector, freelance work, sex work and activism, so we can think about strategies that fit the realities of your working life.
Mental / Physical Health We can explore emotional dysregulation, Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria (RSD), meltdowns, sensory needs, burnout and the impact of ADHD medication on routines and daily life. We can also make space for what an ADHD diagnosis, whether formal or self-identified, means for you.
Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria (RSD) & ADHD
Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria, often shortened to RSD, is a term some ADHD people use to describe an intense emotional or bodily response to rejection, criticism, or the feeling that they may have disappointed someone.
RSD is not currently recognised as a standalone clinical diagnosis, and not everyone with ADHD will relate to it. But for some people, the language can be useful. It can offer a way of making sense of experiences that have previously felt confusing or difficult to explain.
Rejection does not always have to be obvious. A change in someone’s tone, an unanswered message, constructive feedback or uncertainty in a relationship can sometimes bring up a surprisingly strong response. You might find yourself replaying conversations, over-explaining, withdrawing, people-pleasing or working very hard to avoid getting something wrong.
Rather than asking, “Why am I reacting like this?”,
I’m often more interested in another question:
“What might make this response understandable?”
For some people, these patterns sit alongside experiences of being misunderstood, criticised, excluded, or repeatedly told they were too much, too sensitive or not trying hard enough. When we look at the wider context, what can appear like an “overreaction” from the outside may begin to make much more sense.
30 min
Free
What Clients Say About Working With Me
"ADHD Coaching with Stella has been amazing. I’ve always had plenty of ideas and interests, but following through and managing my time felt impossible. I honestly couldn’t picture life without the chaos, but after a year, things have genuinely shifted. Coaching is a slow burner—I didn’t even realise how much was changing until about halfway in. Meeting with Stella each month helped me set goals and, for the first time, actually achieve them. I also really appreciated Stella’s warmth and humour. During our sessions I felt completely myself, able to share openly without judgment. Thank you, Stella"
-Emma S
"I worked with Stella in 2024 as my coach to support my challenges with ADHD. Stella is a super warm and encouraging coach. We hit it off straight away because they are very genuine and therefore I found them so easy to talk to. Stella made me feel really heard, which is exactly what I need from a coach. They're gentle and kind in their approach.
The fact that ADHD informs their own approach obviously means they can come from a place of understanding. But i've had coaches in the past which felt much more "out of the box" and less personal/personable than Stella. I really hope we can work together again in the future, and I recommend you do."
-Rose K
"Really enjoying my adhd coaching with Stella, very clear guidance and understanding, I feel like it's a good fit and I'm able to direct the sessions to where I need it the most. The handouts and ability to reach out to Stella in between sessions has been so helpfull. I highly recomend Stella for therapy and ADHD coaching."
-Paul R
"Stella is one of the most professional, friendly and considerate people I have met. I took part in her 6 week sensory course for regulation and being mother to a neurodivergent child this helped me in more ways than I expected. Being able to understand my child on a deeper level and allowing him time and space to express his needs in a way that was comfortable for him has made such a difference to our relationship and lives.Stella has a very soothing presence and she takes time to understand each individual that she works with.Thank you Stella."
-Clare Evans
"Stella is such a warm, kind, genuine, empathetic person. She makes you feel better just being in her presence. She is so inclusive and beyond non-judgemental. Highly recommend her."
-Row Bot
Is Queer ADHD Coaching For You?
The best way to work out whether we’re a good fit is simply to have a conversation. That’s what the free discovery call is for.
Here are some signs we might work well together:
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You want to understand your ADHD in context, rather than constantly trying to make yourself fit systems that don’t work for you.
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You want practical support with things like overwhelm, time, work, relationships or emotional regulation.
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You value warmth, curiosity and collaboration, alongside enough structure to keep sessions useful.
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You want space to talk about queerness, neurodivergence and identity without having to explain the basics first.
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You want approaches that can change as your needs, capacity and circumstances change.
Meet Stella
Pronouns: She / They
I’m Stella. I hold a PGDip in Occupational Therapy and have experience working in NHS mental health, supporting people with complex mental health and neurodivergent needs. Alongside my training, I bring lived experience of ADHD and dyslexia, and I’m queer and a relationship anarchist.
My work is also shaped by many years of teaching yoga, meditation and embodied practice. I’ve been teaching trauma-informed yoga since 2016, and that experience continues to influence how I think about regulation, the body, relationships and what helps people feel safe enough to explore change.
ADHD Coaching: Price & Location
Price
Coaching is £125 per hour. I work with clients using Access to Work funding, and reduced or sliding-scale rates are also available if you don’t have funding or the full fee isn’t affordable. I also offer a small number of pro bono places. Sessions include handouts, coaching notes and between-session contact. Book a Free Discovery Call
Location
Sessions are available in person in Forest Hill (South East London), on Zoom, or by phone.
Frequency
How often we meet is flexible and depends on what works for you. Some people choose weekly sessions, others meet fortnightly or monthly, and the frequency can change over time as your needs, capacity and circumstances change.
Number of Sessions
The number of sessions varies. Some people receive funding for a set number of sessions, for example 12 through Access to Work, while others fund coaching privately and continue for as long as it remains useful. I’ve worked with some clients for a few sessions and others for several years. We can review what’s helpful as we go.
Approach
My coaching brings together insights from my occupational therapy training, ADHD coaching and lived experience. I draw on person-centred and trauma-informed practice, motivational interviewing, intersectionality and the psychosocial model. Rather than applying a fixed formula, we start by understanding what’s happening in context and work together on approaches that fit your life, relationships, identity and environment.
What ADHD Coaching Isn't
It’s important to understand what ADHD coaching involves
- and what it doesn’t!
Coaching isn't therapy or counseling
Coaching focuses on building strategies to manage challenges, but it does not involve processing past trauma or addressing mental health conditions. For therapeutic and crisis support, a therapist or counsellor would be better suited.
Coaching isn’t about fixing or curing ADHD
Neurodiversity-affirming practice means recognising that ADHD isn’t something to be "fixed." Coaching helps you understand how ADHD shows up for you and supports you in developing tools to work with it, not against it.
Coaching isn’t a quick fix
Building sustainable habits and strategies takes time, commitment, and practice. A coach provides guidance, motivation and structure, but the effort ultimately comes from you. The more you put into the process, the more you’ll get out of it.
Coaching isn’t one-size-fits-all
A holistic, person-centered approach is essential. Every individual’s experience of ADHD is unique, and coaching is tailored to your specific needs, preferences, and goals—rather than offering generic advice.
LGBTQIA+ ADHD Coaching F A Q
What is LGBTQIA+ ADHD coaching?
LGBTQIA+ ADHD coaching is person-centred, trauma-informed support that understands both neurodivergence and queer identities. It’s designed to help you thrive as your authentic self.
Who is your ADHD coaching for?
My coaching is for LGBTQIA+ and neurodivergent adults in the UK—especially those seeking affirming, inclusive support tailored to their unique experiences.
Do you offer online ADHD coaching?
Yes! I work with clients across the UK and beyond via secure video calls, so you can access support wherever you are.
What makes your ADHD coaching different?
As a queer, neurodivergent coach, I bring together lived experience, insights from my occupational therapy training and evidence-based approaches. My coaching centres your identity and needs, offering affirming, practical support.
How do I get started?
Book your Free Discovery Call today to work out if we’re a good fit.
Start Your ADHD Coaching Journey
Momentum Coaching Service
125
Every month
Comprehensive coaching support to build momentum & make significant progress managing ADHD obstacles
6o mins of 1:1 sessions
Opt out available by arrangement
Check-in via whatsapp between sessions
1 x handout after each session to integrate the work
Written notes shared after each session
Access To Work:
How to get the cost of your ADHD Coaching covered by the DWP
Did you know that the UK government’s Access to Work scheme could provide you with up to £69,000 a year in funding to help you succeed at work?
For individuals with ADHD, this funding can unlock access to resources and support that enable you to thrive in your career. From ADHD coaching to specialist equipment, Access to Work is designed to make workplaces more inclusive and supportive.